I’m going away for a while. I need a nice long break. I’ll be back in approximately one month. In the meantime, I convinced Steve Ballmer to stop highjacking my blog and to start a blog of his own. You can read his blog here. I know that my blog stats are going to go down in my absence, but its unavoidable. The IRS are investigating, and I need to go into hiding. Don’t worry, I’ll be back. Until then, LONG LIVE MICOR$UCKS!
We’re stealing Apple’s universal logo and using it for Microsoft Word. Shh! Don’t tell anyone!
We’re now selling a special edition Halo Xbox (Halo not included). Its an ugly brown color that looks like you-know-what. It has a smaller than ever hard drive, an optional Xbox live membership (for an additional $99 a year), and a wired controller. Get yours today at Micro$ucks.com before they all sell out!
We just announced the exact release date for Windows Server 2008. New features include a command line version of Clippy, out of the box support for usb keyboards, and a new .net function to perfor a msn search. More details about Clippy will be announced in the following weeks…
Don’t tell anyone, but I personally am responsible for this. Go ahead Canonical, sue me! I really don’t care. I can pay the price, but can you? Do you dare pay the price for upsetting Microsoft?
UPDATE: PLEASE IGNORE THIS POST! THIS POST WAS WRITTEN BY STEVE BALLMER! HE HACKED INTO MY BLOG AND WROTE IT!
Due to the huge wave of anti Micro$oft, open source loving, ****ing Russian communists that are visiting this website, we (Micro$oft), for the entire world’s sake, have decided to launch a huge new wave of anti communism warfare!
We’ve invested millions in the defense industry, and look forward to huge profits from the upcoming war that we intend to start between the U.S. and the Soviet Union. We’re currently activating a virus that we included in Vista.
The U.S. government is now experiencing technical problems that they believe are caused by Russian hackers.
Now is the time to invest! Invest in Micro$oft now, and you’ll make billions! Now is a time of amazing opportunity! Don’t believe what the communist Steve Jobs tells you. Steve Jobs is part of a communist plot to blow up New York city! Act now before it is too late!
Invest in Micro$oft today and get a free gas mask! LONG LIVE STEVE BALLMER!And always remember…