What The Hell Does This Mean?

My blog just made the Russian new headlines. The only problem is that I don’t understand a single word in Russian, and I don’t even know whether the article is praising or criticizing my blog.

Ray Ozzie (Chief Software Architect for Microsoft) recommended that I try to translate the article using Google’s translation tools. I didn’t want to use them (because they’re made by Google), and I argued with him for ten minutes.

The argument ended when Steve Ballmer started shrieking in the room next door. It turns out that he accidentally electrocuted himself while he was playing with one of our servers. Unfortunately, it was only a minor shock, and he’s already back up causing trouble.

Ballmer Sticking out his tongue

Anyways, Ozzie ran off to help Ballmer, leaving me to make the decision on my own. I reluctantly tried using Google to translate the article and I got this. Here’s an excerpt of the translation:

fakebill.wordpress.com Tozi fresh parodien blog e krsten “Tayniyat diary Bill Gates on.” От него най-после ще научите всичко за плановете на Microsoft да разкаже играта на Apple и Google.It nay-posle Notification teach music for planovete to Microsoft so razkazhe igrata at Apple and Google. Фалшивият Бил демонстрира видеоотговори на Get A Mac

Yep. That was real helpful. Yet another success from Google.

Next I tried using World Lingo to translate. I got this. Here’s an excerpt:

fakebill.wordpress.com Of [t]o[zi] is fresh [parodien] of [blog] e of [krsten] of „They [tayniyat] diary on beaters Gates “. From it [nay]- after the cabbage soup you will learn [vsichko] after you

The most impressive part of the translation was the line “From it [nay]- after the cabbage soup you will learn [vsichko]

By this point, I was getting desperate for a good translation. For certain reasons that I don’t want to mention (related to top secret Microsoft “Research”), I had a Mac on my desk. I pressed f12 and tried using the translation widget to translate the page. Here’s the result:

Translation of that russian article

Now, isn’t that an impressive translation! Typical of Apple, it makes absolutely no sense. Just like World Lingo’s translation, its talking about cabbage soup. Absolutely fascinating!

Anyways, I have to go and talk to the paramedics. They’re insisting on taking Ballmer to the hospital for a check up. Hopefully they’ll do a brain scan or, at the very least, test Ballmer for mental retardedness.

2 Responses to What The Hell Does This Mean?

  1. pdimov says:

    It’s in Bulgarian. Note the .bg domain.

  2. fakebill says:

    Thanks, but I still have no idea what it means.

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